Re: Stories...

MOAR!
MOAR!

I only found a few mistakes. I liked them a lot though.

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Re: Stories...

gaurd502 wrote:

MOAR!
MOAR!

I only found a few mistakes. I liked them a lot though.

Yeah I haven't looked at them for a LONG time. Most of the errors should have been cleared up, but they were posted on the other site so that people could review them and let me know of any problems.

I wish I hadn't lost my trooper part II... it really turned out WELL. It basically tied in parts of the movie like the broadcast, "Imperials troops have entered the base, Imperials troops have..." and the scene of the Falcon flying off with Vader entering. It was all included in my story with a much bigger twist. tongue

I was devastated when my computer died... I lost everything I had at the time, stories, baby pictures, videos, everything. I've learned a lot since about storing my important documents elsewhere.

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"History is on the move, Captain. Those who cannot keep up will be left behind, to watch from a distance. And those who stand in our way will not watch at all." -Grand Admiral Thrawn[/center]

Re: Stories...

That sucks. A lot.

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Re: Stories...

I just now re-read through the stories and I see some the errors I think you probably did as well. A few paragraphing issues, a spelling error here or there. But overall, after years and finally re-reading them, I like what I see. I'm no professional writer in the slightest bit, but I think it's some of my better quality work.

I went looking everywhere for the rest of the story to my Trooper tale... I had thought maybe I had saved it on a USB driver (I have three). But, no... it's gone. I think I'll probably work on it, but I'm trying to do a few stories here (non Star Wars related).

One of my goals in the future was to write a Star Wars novel and have it published when I finally had the skills to create something good enough. I know my current skill level and previous skill is nothing short of mediocre. So, it would be something that would happen much further in the future.

But anyway, after re-reading it, I think I just might remake the last bit of my Trooper story even if it turns out differently.

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"History is on the move, Captain. Those who cannot keep up will be left behind, to watch from a distance. And those who stand in our way will not watch at all." -Grand Admiral Thrawn[/center]

Re: Stories...

Good news and bad news I suppose. I ran into a post on another forum that said I was working on this story on my laptop. It's been years so I figured I'd go dig up my old computer and see what was on it.

Well, I found part II of the Stormtrooper story... unfortunately it's not the rest of it. tongue I know I wrote the last bit somewhere... I just have no idea where it might be.

But anyway, here is part II at least. I'll try and compel myself to re-do the third part. This bit is rather short, so it's a small taste. I have no idea how error free it is, not having read it in years:


Throwing his body against the ice, Gavin brought himself to a stop. Taking a moment to gauge the situation they were in Gavin looked around the docking bay. Nearby, troopers were taking cover from the incoming blaster fire and explosions. Off to his right one of his squad mates was rushing over to him, trying to balance himself on the snow and icy patches.

Click. “The Rebels have set up a strong defensive point up ahead, and the Commander wants us to sweep around and try and find another way through.”, three other Snowtroopers had joined them, taking up a position behind Gavin. “There should be an access tunnel towards the rear of the hangar. It’s supposed to be sealed, so we’ll need to breach it.”

Gavin gave him a short nod, as he chanced a look over the large piece of ice he found as cover. Just forward of the furthest squad of troopers was a barricade with a number of Rebel troopers bunkered down behind it. They seemed to be using the transport containers as cover while firing back at the Stormtroopers in short bursts.

The trooper, who came to relay the message to Bakis, was also surveying the situation when the ice was broken up around them from an explosion. Gavin slipped backwards, falling behind a larger portion of the ice, his blaster crashing to the ground with him. Getting to his feet he reached out and grabbed the trooper who was leaning against the ice. Turning him, the trooper fell onto the ice, smoke pouring through an open hole in his helmet. Gavin removed the helmet to see that he was in fact dead realizing that the trooper was also one of the clones, not a replacement.

These clones had been phasing out of the Imperial Army for the past few years, and being replaced by loyal human soldiers. Most commands refused to supplement their forces with clones, looking down on them. The 501st however, was just the opposite. Under the direct influence of Lord Vader, the 501st had always only operated with clone troopers. With the recent loss of the Death Star and most of the Vader’s Fist, the Commanders of the 501st had to reach out and take in human replacements for the upcoming battle on Hoth.

Gavin had always looked down upon the clones. They were unnatural to him. But amidst the battle, carnage, and death, he couldn’t help but feel compassion for the “man” laying on the ground in front of him. Regardless of his origin, he was a soldier, just like him.

A blast behind him, brought Gavin back into the present. Gavin glanced over his shoulder as an AT-ST outside of the hangar fell onto its' side. A Snowspeeder screamed past the wreckage, with troopers chasing after it. Reaching down he retrieved his blaster, then motioned for the other troopers to follow him. Keeping low, he moved between pieces of cover, occasionally firing off a shot or two back towards the defenders. Ahead of him he could see the access tunnel that was partially hidden behind a large pile of wreckage.

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"History is on the move, Captain. Those who cannot keep up will be left behind, to watch from a distance. And those who stand in our way will not watch at all." -Grand Admiral Thrawn[/center]

Re: Stories...

Tough break with the dying computer man. Its like they know when you haven't backed up stuff in a long while and choose taht exact moment to blow up in your face.

Talking about bad timing, all I can say is where were you a few weeks ago during the fan fic comp eh?

lol lol lol


Not got time to read all these right now, just skimmed over your introductions while enjoying my morning brew at work, look interesting though and will definitely give them a read later.

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Re: Stories...

Read through all your stories during my break at work...  That was a good break tongue

I look forward to more work.

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DUKE815: Teamwork's complicated.  I've found that ramming a Lambda with a Y-wing at full boost is most effective.